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I don't write in this. I have this yearning to be so much more than I… - TABBY

Mar. 13th, 2007

12:37 pm

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I don't write in this. I have this yearning to be so much more than I am. Everyone is so wrapped up in boyfriends and getting high or drinking. So much more to living. I spend so much time worrying about the future that I forget about the present sometimes. I don't know anyone like me. I'm not interested in a whole lot of the things that most of the people I know are into. My beliefs are so strong that I feel like a failure if I ever try to question them. And I'm really shy most times unless I'm really comfortable. My standards and ocd are too outrageous that they scare me away from reaching closer.

I just watch people float in and out of my life like bubbles escaping their form within a second, things changing at the drop of a pin and I'm for it now. I've become more optimistic, I have goals that seem unreachable at times but with the belief and strength in my soul, I know I can get to them. So much negativity is begging to tear me from my morality, beliefs, inner instructions but the devil won't make an Adam out of me.